Monday, May 13, 2013

For The Motherless on Mother's Day


It's been a while since I've been on here. Sorry about that. I've been rather busy!
I know that today is the day after Mother's Day, but I wanted to share a note I wrote last year for Mother's Day.

On a day like today, a day where we honor mothers for bringing their children into the world in a loving environment, rearing them with love and consistency to become productive members of society, molding their gifts and training them to use them wisely, and loving them unconditionally---despite the many mistakes children make, I tend to think not only of praise worthy mothers but also of the hundreds of thousands of children who do not have mothers they can honor.
I am not speaking of those who have lost their mothers to the angel of death. Many of those who have are still able to honor their mother in some way because their mothers were honorable. I am speaking of those who cannot honor their mother because they are not worth honoring.
As unfortunate as it may be, the truth is that there are children in our country (as well as adults) who do not have mothers because they were physically adandoned by them. Some at an early age. These are the ones who grow up in the foster system. While there are wonderful people in that system who love the children placed with them, there are tragically so many who are only in it for the money and often abuse the children placed in their care---as we have so sadly seen in the news!
For many their mothers have prioritized their jobs, their friends, and their social life over that of their children. I'm not saying that mothers cannot work or have friends or a social life. I am speaking of those children who are neglected because of these things. We cannot ignore the fact that it happens and it is an emotional abandonment with consequences.
Typically we hear beautiful messages about how wonderful mothers are on Mother's Day. I have even heard it said that "all mothers deserve to be honored because all mothers love their children." How far from the truth that statement is, and it hurts my heart to make a day purely about telling people they should honor their mother without trying to help them heal from the wounds their mothers have inflicted.
So today, if you are out there and you were either physcially or emotionally abandoned by your mother, I honor you today for surviving without the love you needed from your mother. I honor you today for enduring the pain you have suffered emotionally. Today when you hear people say "happy mother's day" or "be sure to honor your mother today," when you feel that stab in your heart from those words, just know that someone out there understands that today is a painful day for you. You are not alone, there are many others like you in this world and your heart can be healed.